Being in a Wheelchair will not Define Me

Confident, independent, and cheerful. That’s my first impression of Jean Ling. When I met her for the first time, chirpy and smiling, I had a feeling she was someone who you don’t just forget. Not because she’s in a wheelchair but for her affable personality.

In many ways, Jean reminded me of myself. A working mother of 2 children, she loves the outdoors, traveling, and is always excited for new adventures. Yet our difference, she is wheelchair-bound. Jean met with a tragic car accident at the age of 31 that left her paralysed waist down.

In 2014, Jean was on a holiday in Queenstown, New Zealand. In her own words, it was a perfect sunny day for horse riding, and she was looking forward to it. Five minutes before reaching her destination, her car skidded off the road and hit a tree. She suffered from a spinal cord injury that left her permanently disabled. She will never walk again. 

Now, Jean is happily married and prefers to see the glass as half full rather than half empty. Despite her everyday struggles, she continues to believe in living her life to the fullest and without regrets, wheelchair or not. Biometric was privileged to have Jean sharing her story with us. We hope her strength and determination will act as a reminder to all of us to never give up in the face of adversity.

Watch the full interview here:

Biometric: Tell us a bit about yourself, your personality and what you love doing.

Jean: I’m a total extrovert. I always believe in living my life to the fullest, with no regrets. I love traveling. My mom always scolds me for not saving enough, but I like to live life for the moment. I also love talking and meeting people. I love sports – beach volleyball, badminton, scuba diving. During the weekends, I’m always at the beach or the pool. Really not a shopping mall person.

Biometric: Walk us through that day that changed your life.

Jean: I was on a holiday in New Zealand. It was a perfect day; good sunny weather and I was on my way to do horse riding. Suddenly, the car I was driving skidded off the road and went down a small hill. The next thing I knew, the car was turning and rolling. It collided with a tree. My legs were wrapped around the steering wheel in an awkward position. I couldn’t feel the lower part of my body. I started shouting for help and that’s when blood started spurting out from my mouth. I had difficulties breathing. And I kept fainting. I knew then something was seriously wrong with my body. I started pressing on the horn in the hope of getting some attention. Soon after, the firefighters and paramedics were on the scene, helping me get out of the car. And I was airlifted to the nearest hospital. 

Biometric: What was your state of mind after the accident and how did you move forward?

Jean: I think my character played a big role in my recovery process. After my surgery and when I woke up, I still couldn’t move my legs no matter how hard I tried. I suffered from a spinal cord injury, where my spinal cord was entirely severed. I was told that I would be paralysed forever from the chest down. I will have no bladder control, no bowel control – no sensation at all. Of course, I cried a lot – I still tear up today. I feel sad when I think about the many things I can’t do for my children, my loved ones, and myself. Emotionally it is very difficult – it may take forever to recover.  But I think because of the mindset I have of never regretting anything I do in life, mentally I was more prepared to accept the reality of my situation. Of course, I also had my family and friends beside me, supporting me and helping me along the way. I tell myself I’m not the worst – I still have my hands. So I try to be positive, stay on the right track, and do the right thing.

Biometric: How much of an influence is your husband in your journey to recovery?

Jean: My husband plays a big role in building up my confidence. After the accident, my confidence level shattered. I can’t wear a nice slim dress and walk into a restaurant. But he makes me feel like a normal person. He doesn’t look at me as a girl in a wheelchair. For instance, for me to come out of the train station, I need to take a few lifts to reach my destination. It may take me longer, but he assures me that it doesn’t matter – “We will reach there eventually, so what if takes a bit longer.” He gave me the confidence that I could be loved again.

Biometric: In hindsight, will you do anything differently in terms of financial planning?

Jean: During my recovery stage, I was constantly thinking about how I was going to support myself being permanently disabled. How am I going to support my family? Can I have a family on my own? How will I manage financially as there will always be medical bills for me to pay? Will I lose my job? Will I have an income? I couldn’t see my future and its uncertainties. At that moment, I told myself to focus on my recovery first but at the back of my mind, I was always thinking about it. I think it’s important to protect yourself financially. I do regret for not doing more in this aspect. I had travel insurance that helped me with the expenses after the accident, but I knew it would not last forever. Now as a mom, I know I must plan to protect my children's future. Although the likelihood of such an unfortunate event as what happened to me won’t happen to everyone, you’ll never know what the future holds. Because it has happened to me, I realise the importance of it (financial planning).

Biometric: What are your final thoughts to anyone who’s facing setbacks in life (and not just those who are wheelchair-bound)?

Jean: Everyone’s different. I can’t expect others to think like me, to look at life the way I do. But I would say that in life there are ups and downs. When we are up we are happy. But when we are down, just learn to let go – cry it out, find someone to talk to. Based on your personality, find a way out to deal with it. Ask yourself what’s the best way to find a solution. And if you still can’t find a way out, open your mouth and ask for help. It’s not a dead end. There are a lot of junctions and it’s all about choices.

Thank you Jean for your story and we wish you all the best in your future endeavours. 

Income Protection is a Necessity

As an income protection solution provider, Biometric hopes this story will change perceptions and increase awareness on the need for financial security. We may not be able to control accidents and illnesses, but we can plan to protect our income, expenses, and loved ones. Talk to us now on income protection solutions for your peace of mind.